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Cate Blanchett and Star Trek would be a match made in heaven – please make it happen | Cate Blanchett

Eevery now and then a planned film project sounds so right that you can almost touch it, even if it has about as good a chance of actually being shown in multiplexes as Vladimir Putin did on the Nobel Peace Prize. Reports this week suggest that Cate Blanchett, the much-crowned doyenne of serious cinema, was recently cast in the lead role in a Star Trek film for Noah Hawley, the director of Fargo (the TV edition) and Legion, had started.

Regular readers of this blog post will be aware that Paramount has decided to take a different tack with the next installment in the Starship Enterprise’s ongoing adventures. They bring back Chris Pines Captain Kirk and Zachary Quintos Spock, along with their rebooted comrades from the JJ Abrams-led trilogy, but Wandavision director Matt Shakman will be the man in the command chair instead.

That means we’re going to start hearing things about how Hawley’s version might have gone under, and one of those nuggets is Blanchett’s involvement. Exactly what role she would have played isn’t public knowledge, but the thought of the Australian actor as the captain of her own Starfleet spaceship, battling strange-looking aliens and discovering anomalies in deep space is so compelling that it’s probably already happening for real now in a much cooler alternate reality than the unfortunate one we live in.

Cate Blanchett as Irina Spalko in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Photo: Lucasfilm/Allstar

Why Blanchett has only appeared in a handful of major genre projects in her career – her Galadriel in The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Irina Spalko in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and the son of Odin’s nefarious sister Hela in Thor: Ragnarok spring in the sense – is a mystery. Few other actors can munch the scenery with such lusty ferocity and mischievous delight as the awards-season favorite. Yet so often she seems limited to the type of films she only critiques.

Perhaps Blanchett’s resentful absence from the genre kitchen is due to the fact that she’s clearly picked the wrong projects on occasion. Spalko may be Steven Spielberg’s favorite indie villain, but Kingdom of the Crystal Skull itself was a rather clumsy attempt to jump the shark from daring archaeological fantasy to butt-faced sci-fi. Which brings us to Blanchett’s latest foray into mainstream cinema, the upcoming video game adaptation, Borderlands.

What? i hear you ask Yes, Blanchett takes the lead in a large-scale take on the 2009 open-world first-person “plunderer-shooter,” which describes Lilith as a notorious outlaw with a mysterious past who reluctantly returns to her home planet of Pandora (No, not this one ) to find the missing daughter of a powerful tyrant. The film is directed by Eli Roth, he from the hostel films and the goddamn Death Wish remake. It all sounds like seduction in a delicious bowl of Klingon gagh.

Can’t we just bring Hela back into the Marvel game? The Asgardian deity may have died at the hands of the fire demon Surtur at the end of Ragnarok, but how exactly do you kill the death goddess? I mean, there has to be some scriptwriting remedy here to help her get back into the action. After all, DC brought Superman back with a box of nonsense and some sticky plastic!

Cate Blanchett with Elijah Wood in Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, 2001.
Cate Blanchett with Elijah Wood in Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, 2001. Photo: New Line Cinema / Allstar

If that’s not the case, maybe Paramount can figure out a way to feature Blanchett in Star Trek 4 after all. It doesn’t have to be a big role: she could be revealed to be Scotty’s more elegant, huggable sister, or the leader of a race of all-female aliens on the verge of achieving civilian nirvana when Kirk accidentally drops a thousand tons of tribbles on their capital . We take everything at this point. Just please don’t waste a double Oscar winner on a bad Eli Roth video game flick.

But hey, we’re talking Star Trek here. Maybe we can just pull out the old “red matter” and create an “alternate timeline” where this article never had to be written because Hollywood studios are making better creative choices. And if not, maybe it’s time for Ragnarok to plunge the whole damn place into fiery oblivion.

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